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Chill When I'm Dead

from Validation Matthew Christ by Manic Carbon

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lyrics

I feel contested, this corner I’ve been pressed in
I give you my presence, my presence unpleasant
When fear coalesces, i’m here for one minute,
No matter where the next is, i’m scattered and reckless
Won’t dial back my tone, so don’t tell me to hold it
When I’m in my emotions, all truces broken
If you make me opponent, that’s a bad omen
I’m known to hone in, my telescope focused
My flame has been stoked, if it feels like i’m boasting
That’s not the point, and that’s not what i’m supposing
Mostly, i’m tired that the world is so hopeless
Too quick to turn a mirror into self-diagnosis
Fuck the external forces, you can’t take me alive, habeas corpus
Run free wild horses
Mix of chorus and distortion
Hoard resources from the poorest, heard this story once before
And it’s the sort of reoccurring curse that’s normal now

Weight of the world rests on the tortoise
It’s unnoticed in rigor mortis
Pull up the roots of the trees, see the rot from within, they failed to nurture the seeds
Barricaded my enclave
And dodged how many early graves?
Done with the days of behavior, they’re phased out, i’m on the edge of razor blades
Y’all gave witness, quit with semantics, picked at my rib, conflicts stacked
Like dirty dishes in my kitchen, genie out of wishes, not a foothold in could mend this
New phone who dis? i’m a menace
I might pull tricks or i might sulk in trenches
When shit gets contentious, you hit me like tennis
Cause for concern, convert the hurt to apprehension
Until the day i’m buried in dirt, i’m trapped with the tension

I’m on defense, don’t wanna pen in past tense
Convinced myself the whole world had gone and then amassed against me
I’ll pretend to portend, i thought i saw my end coming with my seventh sense
No pastiche and no dependence
Carry my penance close to my heart like a pendant
All the past ten years have been a fall into decadence
Lash out, crash and burn, in a flash i’ll be back
When they roll on me like thunder, i crack like lightning
For the crimes of passion please indict me
Cry me a river, just don’t stymie my liver
Forced to stand and deliver in the hot and cold wars
Settle the score, won’t be your pinch hitter anymore
When it rains it pours, the pain don’t fade, it’s stored
You don’t wanna be there when it bursts down the doors
They tell me to relax, it’s fine, go rest your head
But I’ve got an ax to grind so i’ll chill when i’m dead

credits

from Validation Matthew Christ, released August 12, 2022

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Manic Carbon Los Angeles, California

Moral Reef
Sadsic
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